This is an age-old concept and, any girls reading this get ready to get triggered because this is going to just set you off. Girls are not that straightforward. Girls by nature are not very confrontational, so they will ghost you, lie to you, just say whatever sounds nicer and what sounds better in their head. So here are just a few tips and little phrases to look out for, that way you know what women are actually saying when are saying stuff. Things Girls Say VS What They Actually Mean.
1. I’m fine
You already know the deal on this one. Clearly, she’s not fine at all. What she means is she’s not okay and she would appreciate it if you guys had 45 minutes to an hour and a half long conversations about the issue that she’s mad about. During this conversation/argument you need to be the one that admits to being wrong, even if you’re not the one wrong. You still have to apologize and say that you are wrong Otherwise, she’s going to continue with the passive-aggressive attitude.
2. Nothing much, somebody that can make me laugh.
You may ask this question, “what do you look for in a guy?”. This can be her answer.
What she actually means is she wants a guy who is extremely attractive, extremely muscular, financially stable, great personality, and if you can make her laugh that’s just added bonus.
3. I’m not really looking for relationship right now.
She’s ready for a relationship if the right guy comes along. You’re just not the right guy. She just doesn’t know what to tell you, so it is just the best excuse.
4. No, I have a boyfriend
This is the biggest lie; she just doesn’t like you at all. She is basically telling you to get away, leave her alone. She’s just saying that she has a boyfriend to get you to scram and run away. That’s it!
5. No, I don’t even like him anymore
What she actually means is that she is freaking pressed on this dude, still press, has been, always will be. She cries herself to sleep every night thinking about this dude. Actually, claims not to worry about this guy at all, but he is the only thing that’s on her mind.
“It is what it is, you may have won this one, but I will not admit it and accept defeat.”
7. I’ll be ready in five minutes.
Five minutes equals an hour, maybe a few hours. I just need to re-do my hair and makeup, get my purse ready, look in the mirror a million times and take a few hundred selfies before I can leave the house.
8. I don’t want to ruin our friendship
I have never thought about dating you, and I don’t like you enough to change my mind. I am not sexually attracted to you. You will never see me naked. But you are my friend and I don’t want to hurt your feelings.
9. I’m not hungry at the moment.
I can’t think of what I fancy to eat, but if you start eating, I will want what you’re having and will soon join in and take your food, and don’t you dare moan about it.
10. I feel ugly today.
Please reassure me and tell me that I look nice, I just need some comfort and sympathy.
11. I don’t know why other girls don’t like me much.
I am a bit of a bitch, okay I admit it. But I just want to seem nice and a good person so you don’t think bad of me.
12. Do you think she’s pretty?
Even if she’s a goddamn supermodel, you better point out a flaw, and tell me she ‘isn’t your type’.
13. He’s nice.
“I am on the fence about how I feel about him, so I am going to use the most vanilla adjective possible, please stay tuned for updates on the creep-hottie spectrum.”
14. I want to take it slow.
I kind of want to make sure you’re not fucking insane before I get attached.
15. I’ve been busy
I am not interested to make time to see you or make plans with you. I’d rather spend time with my girlfriends or go shopping. You are the last thing on my mind.
16. I am not sure where our relationship is going, I need time to think
I am having doubts about you, I really don’t know what I want. I am starting to think that you are not the right man for me. I need time to decide how I am going to break up with you.
17. Leave me alone
Go away for a few minutes until I calm down, then I expect you to come back and cuddle me.
18. Am I over reacting?
I know I am, but please tell me you are on my side and that you agree with me, so I don’t feel like I’m a lunatic.
19. I have nothing to wear.
My wardrobe is so full of clothes, I don’t know where to start. I need something new so I don’t have to dig through everything I own.
20. I’m not like other girls.
I have a really warped view of what ‘other girls’ do and will probably be really suspicious of any female friends you do have.
21. I need space
I am not alright, I have so many emotions right now. I just need time to myself.
22. It’s up to you.
Careful. This is a test. In actual fact, it is not up to you, and the next few words you utter, better be well thought out before answering. You must answer so it looks like it is your decision, but think very carefully about how she would answer if it was her choice. You must answer as if it is her that makes the decision, but the words need to come from your mouth. This will make you look caring and considerate, and also like you have the same interests.
23. Have fun tonight. (Things Girls Say VS What They Actually Mean)
How could you go out without me? I’m all you need right here!
24. We need to talk.
You better think of everything you could have possibly done wrong, forgotten birthday? Anniversary? Whatever it is, it’s about to kick off. Rack your brains and be ready to be apologetic.
25. Excuse me?
Oh, I heard you, I’m just giving you a chance to change what you said.
26. It’s not you, it’s me
It’s definitely you.
27. I’m not mad
I am mad, very much actually. I’m not going to tell you why – you have to figure it out yourself.
28. Do whatever you want
Actually, don’t do whatever you want. I am just testing you. I am daring you, not permitting you.
29. We Can Eat Anywhere, I don’t Care”
Translates To: Name my 5 top favorite restaurants right now so I can choose where to eat. Come on, you know the answer.
30. Yes (Things Girls Say VS What They Actually Mean)
Yes, except maybe in all probability, no.
NOTE: This post was written for comedy purposes only. All women are different and this does not represent the behavior of every woman out there.